A couple of days ago, I penned The Dark Knight Rises iOS preview, and now the full review’s finally here, baby.
I won’t lie to you: I haven’t finished The Dark Knight Rises, as it’s in-sanely long. But I had to draw the line somewhere, partly because I don’t have dozens of hours spare to dedicate to it, and partly because, well, it’s a bit crap, really.
As I mentioned in the preview, The Dark Knight Rises is immediately handicapped by the weight of expectation: a) it’s saying: “Hey, I’m the game of the freakin’ excellent movie,” and b) Batman: Arkham City on home consoles was awesomeness.
Within a few missions, it becomes clear that The Dark Knight Rises has very little to do with the movie whatsoever, as evidenced in, for example, the well type section.
While The Dark Knight Rises the movie deals with the mental and emotional torture of Batman watching his beloved Gotham City fall to bits while trapped in the middle of nowhere, The Dark Knight Rises the game instead opts for a brawlfest through some sort of adjacent industrial area. Sigh.
To be fair, there are a few occasions where The Dark Knight Rises the game uses black and white stills to fill in the story, and they’re very much welcome.
However, the remainder of the game, what I’ve seen of it, is all about brawling, defusing bombs, taking out snipers, defusing some more bombs, and taking out even more snipers. Sooooo many snipers. Seriously, a more suitable title would’ve been Sniper Punch.
That’s not necessarily a bad thing; even the best game can be fairly repetitive. But there’s plenty about The Dark Knight Rises that’s downright irritating.
Flying around looks pretty impressive, but turning and landing are a nightmare. Speaking of landing, remember that cool thing in Arkham City where Batman couldn’t suffer fall damage? Instead, he used his cloak to achieve a graceful, pain-free landing. Not so in The Dark Knight Rises. Batman here is a clumsy moron who regularly half kills himself when he falls. Sigh.
The fighting is incredibly tedious too. Like Gameloft’s The Amazing Spider-Man, The Dark Knight Rises steals the combat system from the console games, ‘cept – needless to say – it’s not quite as fluid; there’s no combo counter, and you can get hit while countering. More sighs.
And, as I’ve said a couple of times, there’s the length. I must’ve knocked out over a hundred thugs and snipers, and defused dozens of bombs, and I was barely half way through after maybe 8-10 hours. Seriously, when there’s so much repetition, does the game have to be this long? Are you guys getting paid per sniper or something? Jeez.
Overall, The Dark Knight Rises isn’t that bad a game, it’s just not much fun, is far too long, and has little to do with the movie. And roll credits.
- Looks pretty good
- Batman roolz
- Er, plenty of gaming for your buck
- Far too long/repetitive
- Too ambitious for touchscreen, perhaps
- It’s £4.99
Summary: Like I say, not terrible, but not much fun. The Dark Knight Rises will certainly keep you busy, but not necessarily happy.
Requirements: Compatible with iPhone 3GS, iPhone 4, iPhone 4S, iPod touch (3rd generation), iPod touch (4th generation) and iPad. Requires iOS 4.0 or later.
Price: £4.99 @ App Store