Jesus Hates Zombies Android review

Jesus Hates Zombies Android reviewNow that I’m actually typing, I’ve realised Jesus Hates Zombies is a strange choice of app to spotlight. Am I reviewing a smartphone app, or critiquing a comic that simply happens to be hosted on my phone? Probably a spot of both.

Jesus Hates Zombies was written by indie comic dude Stephen Lindsay. Specifically, this is the first part, namely Those Slack-Jaw Blues. So there.

Even more specifically, Those Slack-Jaw Blues is split into four parts: Beginnings, Price Check, For Your Amusement and Rest Home.

Interestingly, each part is illustrated by a different artist. Beginnings, as you might expect, sets the scene, with God telling Jesus he’s sending him back to earth to take care of a zombie apocalypse. Unfortunately, JC will remain powerless until he can convince people to believe again.

Price Check sees Jesus thrown out of a grocery shop; For Your Amusement features zombie clowns in an amusement park; and Rest Home finds Jesus looking for somewhere to sleep.

Thankfully, Jesus Hates Zombies is nowhere near as teenage angsty as I feared. It does rely a little on the “wow, Jesus is swearing!” schtick at first, but it’s mildly amusing. At points.

The Jesus Hates Zombies app has 85 pages in total, viewed in landscape. The four mini-stories take up 69 pages, with the remaining 16 previewing American Terror: Confession of a Human Smart Bomb.

Navigation is made easy with unobtrusive left and right buttons, and you can jump to specific pages if necessary. I’m not sure what else you could possibly want. Simple but effective.

There’s not a great deal of reading in the first offering from Jesus Hates Zombies. You’ll probably whiz through it in less than 10 minutes. It’s a fairly enjoyable 10 minutes, assuming you (a) like zombies, and (b) aren’t religious. In fact, even if you happen to worship the Heavenly Father, it’s not particularly offensive.

Sadly, the link to download the next instalment doesn’t work. Worse still, the paper comics cost a freakin’ fortune. I kinda want to know what happens, man.

Right, I’m away to email Stephen Lindsay. You should read Jesus Hates Zombies on your Android phone. Bye.


  • Zombies
  • Pokes fun at religion – religion is silly
  • It’s free


  • Not massively intellectual
  • Very short
  • Can’t download the second issue!

Summary: Jesus Hates Zombies - Those Slack-Jaw Blues is an enjoyable four-part introduction to Jesus’ war on zombies.

Developer: Robot Media

Requires: Android 1.5 or above.

Price: free @ Android Market

Jesus Hates Zombies Android review

Read more about: Android

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 1 comment

StephenRL77  Jan. 4, 2012 at 16:31

Lewis, email me and I'll see what I can do to hook you up with the actual books! :)
~ Stephen


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