Of the first nine games I reckon we’ve had four really good ones, some ok-ish, and some not so good. Ready for the last five?
Definitely contender for the best title of all time. Nice one. I’ll let Dennis explain how it works: “Twit must fly high until he reaches the moon. Birds, planes and asteroids will make him have a hard time.”
Moon Twit is essentially a really stripped down and rough-around-the-edges Turtle Fly. And guess what. I made it! Despite some hilariously huge asteroids (I genuinely laughed out loud), I made it all the way to the moon.
No prizes for guessing that Oingokong takes its cue firmly from Nintendo, with Donkey Kong-esque protagonist Oingo.
In Oingokong, you’re tasked with collecting a number of gold rings on a fixed playing area while avoiding Goomba-style baddies, and, well, that’s it really. There are currently four stages, enough to keep you fairly entertained on a short bus trip or whatever.
Cave Escape is one of them copter games wherein you fly automatically from left to right at a fixed speed, and touching the iPhone’s screen controls your altitude.
To be honest, I seriously struggled to make much progress in Cave Escape. Let go of the screen for one second and the ship drops right off the bottom – it’s that sensitive. I can only assume the ship is made from a ludicrously dense substance.
“Rescue 50 people to unlock spooky mode!” it says at the bottom of the screen. My record is one survivors, so I’ve got a long way to go…
I dreaded to think what the idea was in Blowmaster. Did I really want to be - or become - a master blower? Well, yes, as it happens.
Blowmaster is more of a fun distraction than a full game. You compete against a fellow blower in a race to explode your balloon (that’s not a euphemism, by the way), which is achieved by tapping the hell out of your iDevice’s screen as fast as possible.
I managed to beat Blowmaster on the hardest setting, so there’s not much reason to go back to it. Ever. But it was fun for a couple of minutes.
This isn't just Robobroid, man. This is Robodroid Deluxe. Get it right.
Robodroid Deluxe is a pretty basic match three game in which you drop pieces from the top. By wiping out flashing pieces, you can spell out the word “ROBOT”.
Match three veterans who like to spend a bit of time setting up a cheeky five – say two pairs with a fifth piece dropped in the middle – needn’t bother; you can only match three at a time.
Well, that’s us at the end. I’m sleepy, and I’ve already written 500 words, so I’ll supply my verdict on Retrogamebox at the weekend. Goodnight.